I've decided to make Lyric a longterm project for myself. Every time I feel like I'm coming close to the end of it I read through it again and see how much I need to change and take out, and how much it's departing from what I want it to be. I think I've put too much time into that one to be happy putting out any version of it that wasn't pretty much perfect, and perfection takes time. It's also not the point of this blog.
So, for the sake of productivity, that will be my personal project from now on, and I'll let you know when it's done. In the meantime, here's a finished-ish version of the sestina I promised.
How they love and how they die
Something
sinister was on the move. Invisible, probably,
or
maybe underground.
The
villagers had shut themselves,
their
children
and
their mothers away, inside their houses,
where
they were safe. Such was their conviction.
They
stayed strong in their conviction,
with
good reason, probably.
In
their houses
they
had bibles and blankets and canned soup, and their children, and themselves, and
underground
the
others, and the other children.
But
not the living. Not yet themselves.
They
wrapped the blankets round the children and their arms around themselves,
and
then they were warm, and they were safe in their conviction.
They
thought of clever stories to tell the children,
and
when they didn’t work anymore they told them it would all be over soon.
Probably.
And
they wondered if they felt things shuffling underground
and
strange noises outside their houses.
They sealed the windows of the houses
and kept the bad air and the noises away from themselves.
They tried not think about the spaces underground,
not to imagine themselves there, not to shift in their conviction
that this, this thing they were doing, that this was the right
thing, probably,
for themselves. For the children.
They would stay strong for the children.
They had to. They lit candles and imagined the warmth filling
their houses,
the way they’d been told the sun would soon, probably.
They wouldn’t admit it to themselves
if they started to doubt. They would sit and wait for the conviction
to return, and they would hold the space between their loved
ones and the things underground.
They wouldn’t admit it to themselves, that they weren’t sure
they remembered ‘underground’,
or ‘outside’. They repeated the stories of the old times to
their children
and they heard the words they spoke with such conviction,
and they usually believed themselves. There were still things
outside the houses,
people
besides themselves.
And
they would see them all again, they said. Probably.
They
had stopped hearing anything underground, though they still told the children
to
step lightly. And when they felt convicts of their own conviction, prisoners of
their houses,
they
told themselves it would all be over soon, probably.
I think the best thing to do with sestinas is try to use the forced repetition to your advantage in some way. I hope I kind of pulled that off here. What's actually going on is supposed to be ambiguous, but I'm interested in your interpretations. Bonus points to anyone who can identify the source of the title.
New post coming on monday!
I know where the title is from... But I also know that I cheated to find that out =p
ReplyDeleteBefore I found out I was definitely thinking zombies. Still thinking zombies actually; they've infected my thinking now. I know that's not what you were going for, but it is a rather fun aberrant reading (for a The Walking Dead reader, at least).
Structure-wise, I think sestinas are the poem version of Eric =p (Olle - am I the only one who hears Strong Bad ala Teen Girl Squad saying, "I miss Kristina" when I read "sestina"?...) I do like it, and I think you chose a topic/setting of entrapment that suits the use of repetition. Go you!
Re what's happening with Lyric, I like that you've decided to put it to one side with the intent of refining it to a point where you're happy with it. I agree, you started the blog so you could go about finishing things, but thinking about it this way: I'm sure it's a lot less unfinished now than the original seed of a story you started with; you're certainly finishing it.
ReplyDeleteI like the idea of starting a blog with a clear goal in mind, but also being able to mould yourself around what the blog ends up becoming and working out what that means for your content. I'm more than happy to follow the (mis?)adventures Eric in the long term.
:D
ReplyDeleteAndy, your comments are the best kind of comments. I loved what you said about Lyric being 'less unfinished'. This feeds into what I was saying the other week about how it's still better to keep making an effort to do something and not achieve everything you want to than to give up on it altogether when you first start to fail. Also I really like the zombie reading. I could have fun writing a really serious, ruminative piece about the undead.
I MISS SESTINA.
ReplyDeleteMan I loved this. It's deliciously claustrophobic.